Journalist specializing in tourism/gastronomy/well-being/parenting
in collaboration with
Catherine Pierrat (psychologist)
For those who believe in it, perfect compatibility between two people exists. But what is a soul mate? What is its role, how to find it? And, how to recognize your spiritual soul mate? So many questions that we asked a psychologist.
Myth or reality ? Whether in the context of a romantic, friendship or spiritual relationship, the notion of a soul mate and perfect romantic or friendly compatibility is a dream. A merger that would almost think of the brotherly relationship that twins can have. Thus, the soul mate, or soulmate in its Anglo-Saxon version, can have several definitions. Explanations.
What is a soul mate?
“In common parlance, a soul mate is someone with whom there is a special and predestined connection, a perfect and unique compatibility in a romantic relationship. Most people think that everyone has only one soul mate and pass sometimes their whole life looking for it”explains Catherine Pierrat, psychologist, before adding: “But this notion of soul mate is not only linked to love. It can also evoke the notion of “group of souls”, a group of people with whom we are connected spiritually and who help us to evolve, to learn during our different lives by interacting with us. And in this case, we do not have “ONE” soul mate, but several soul mates, with whom we can interact in different relationships (family, love, friendship but also professional…)”.
This concept is, of course, corroborated with the notion of reincarnation. Indeed, in different traditions and religions, we find this notion of soul mate. For example, in the Jewish tradition and more particularly kabbalistic, we speak of “bashert” which designates the one to whom (to whom) each one is intended. The word “bashert” also means “destiny”. The idea is that when a male individual is created, so is their female counterpart.
In philosophy, the myth of the soul mate was described by Plato in a work written around 380 years before Jesus Christ: in Feast, the poet Aristophanes reports that formerly, humans had four legs and four arms, but that, for defying the Gods, they were cut in two. And since then, every human being is looking for his half, in other words his soul mate to deliver him from dissatisfaction, the lack from which his soul suffers as long as the two halves are not reunited.
In another register, a famous video platform used this lever of the soul mate to make a series of it, The Onewhere from a genetic test, we can know the ideal partner, which is intended for us.
Signs of meeting your soul mate
According to Catherine Pierrat, there are several signs that refer to the meeting between two soul mates.
- A strong feeling and feeling of knowing the person, when seeing them for the first time;
Some even speak of “physical shock” with manifestations such as chills, a lump in the throat, tears that well up in the eyes, goosebumps… when meeting their partner. The exchange of the first glance can also trigger a strong reaction. “Besides, don’t we say that the gaze is the mirror of the soul?underlines the psychologist.
- The impression of being immediately at ease from the start of the relationship, in harmony with the person, with the feeling of being “on the same wavelength”;
- The ease of communicating and understanding each other from the first meeting, sometimes even without having to talk to each other;
- The large number of things in common, with “coincidences”;
- Often the same fundamental values, the same way of thinking and the same tastes and quests;
- The notions of evidence and fluidity in what is experienced in common with the added impression of being “pulled up” by the other person and of evolving;
- An impression of complementarity, even completeness;
- A sense of well-being, inner peace andpositive energy.
The role of a soul mate
According to Catherine Pierrat, “the role of a soul mate is to make us evolve, move forward and become a whole and fulfilled being. The soul mate pushes us to question ourselves, to expand our comfort zone, to discover who we really are, to use and develop buried gifts. And above all, the soul mate is proud of our evolution, never limits us, stimulates us and wishes only our happiness!”. In summary, the soul mate tickles, stimulates, motivates, guides, awakens, inspires, pushes to go forward and always further. But the soul mate does not necessarily bring only joyful moments. It is also present in difficult times and can make us experience one or more of the “5 wounds of the soul”, help to soothe them, even to heal them. The 5 wounds of the soul are betrayal, rejection, abandonment, humiliation and injustice. “This is why a relationship with a soul mate is not always idyllic, nor easy, but it is also through the difficulties that one learns and progresses”warns the psychologist.
This is THE big question that everyone would like to have an answer to. However, the quest for this life partner, this ideal emotional connection or friend sister is not easy or programmed.
“We can hope that fate will make us meet the soul mate, but we can wait for this couple sometimes during all his (this) life”, comments Catherine Pierrat. So, maybe we need to challenge fate a bit? In any case, with regard to the soul or soul mates, in the context of a romantic relationship, many dating sites use this term to sell their services. After all why not ?
But there are other ways to bring about encounters, such as sports, artistic, social, humanitarian activities… Because it is not by staying at home that one can meet a companion or better still a soul mate !
For our specialist, “the most important thing is to move, meet, socialize, but also be ready to have a nice encounter, which implies that you are in a great openness of mind and heart, and above all rid of your prejudices and limiting thoughts. You also need to be attentive to the signs and listen to your intuition“.
However, if despite all your efforts to meet, it does not happen… do not complain! There is certainly a good reason. It means that you have things to do alone, and that it’s just not the right time for a romantic affair, a life as a couple. A little pro advice though: keep in mind that life and the universe are in sync and it’s all about timing. So, patience and trust!
Good in your body, good in your head!
Is a soul mate necessarily linked to a love story?
If we refer above to the concept of “group of souls”, the soul mate is not necessarily linked to a love story or to the feeling of love, to desire. A strong compatibility can also discover a spiritual soul mate or a sister friend, in reference to a friendly connection, an emotional connection, a spiritual sharing. A relationship that can be close to that of two sisters, or even an almost identical life, with a common thread. “The soul mate actually belongs to the same group of souls with whom you have already been in a relationship and who come back in your current life either to resolve things that have not been settled between you, for example, or to make you evolve in a certain area, or support you in a test. This person can therefore be a colleague, a family member, your neighbour, your best friend)… ” assures the psychologist. Clearly, your soul mate, or your soul mates, may be very close to you and you have already found each other naturally… without having to look very far!
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Recognize and meet your soul mate
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