Making love with your partner, with a stranger, with a friend, in a public place… Our erotic dreams torment us. But do they really have a special meaning? Are they a reflection of our sex life? Answers with Véronica Olivieri-Daniel, psychoanalyst.
Erotic dreams are sometimes uncomfortable. However, they have nothing to be ashamed of! We can dream of making love with a man, a woman, a friend, a friend, a stranger, her husband, her ex-partner, a co-worker or even a member of her family. Away from prying eyes or in public, whether you’re in love or not. Whatever the scenario, dreaming that you are having sex with someone can be extremely disturbing. When you wake up, you wonder about the meaning of this kind of erotic dream and the pleasure you felt: what does it hide from our sexual desire? Is our unconscious trying to send us a message? In reality, our erotic dreams can cover multiple facets of which we should not be afraid.
What does it mean to dream of making love?
According to Freud, dreams represent the fulfillment of an unconscious desire, just like slips of the tongue, phobias and obsessions. Sexual urges, which are restrained during waking life, can then express themselves freely. However, the psychoanalyst does not distinguish the erotic dream from other dreams, even if the notion of sexual drive is very active in the erotic dream. “ According to him, there is never a causal link between the content of the dream and any explanation of reality. So, dreaming that you would like to sleep with your boss does not mean that you would really like to do so. It could mean something else, like the fact that there was a strong emotional discussion and that he is resented”, says Véronica Olivieri-Daniel. In other words, the erotic dream remains a dream like any other, there is only an associated orgasmic sensory state. Moreover, it is rare that we remember a sexual dream with precision. “ What we remember is having experienced an orgasm, or something close to it, during the night. Eager to obtain an interpretation, we draw the conclusion that we had an erotic dream but it is not only a succession of images or the feeling of having lived a beautiful story, it is also sensory »she continues.
What are the most frequent erotic dreams and what is their meaning?
If our erotic dreams do not necessarily have a hidden meaning, they are nevertheless revealing of a unconscious desire that is expressed during our sleep. And it is perfectly legitimate to want to find a meaning for them! Deciphering our most frequent dreams of sexual relations.
- Dreaming of making love with your ex: no, dreaming of sleeping with your ex partner with whom you were in love does not imply that you want to put the cover back! The ex is only a representation of the male or female figure.
- Dreaming of making love in a public place: this type of dream would be a sign of an unconscious desire, a fantasy that one does not dare to fulfill in waking life.
- Dreaming of making love with a stranger: dreaming of having sex with a person you don’t know indicates a need for renewalto give free rein to his fantasies.
- Dreaming of making love with a person of the same sex: dreaming of having sex with a woman when you are a woman or with a man when you are a man is not a sign that shows you are homosexual, but that our homosexual fantasy and our psychic bisexuality were released overnight.
“Homosexuality is considered by all psychoanalysts, including Freud, as a psychic bi-sexuality which is not established physically but psychically. You can be attracted to both men and women. Strong friendships in adolescence with girls holding hands, football teams changing in the locker room are part of this psychic homosexuality. Dreams of voyeurism, exhibitionism, infidelity, homosexuality, are fantasy categories that we suppress in our waking life and which are released in dreams. These dreams are nothing but the expression of what is called psychic sexuality. When we live sexuality, we break our fantasies and our fantasies, the dream allows the explosionration but also the fulfillment of these unconscious desires”develops the psychoanalyst.
Do erotic dreams reveal our sexuality?
According to our expert, the erotic dream is not at all revealing of our sexuality. “Frigid women whose sexual life is extremely limited or even impossible or hindered may hide deep desire within them and have many erotic dreams. We must distinguish the real sexual life lived with more or less inhibitions and freedom, more or less fantasy, and the liberation of all that which is possible in dreams. In other words, one should not take the content of this kind of erotic, sensory dreams in the first degree or interpret them as the symbolism of something specific, it is simply an indicator of good psychic health. she reassures.
Dreaming of making love, an indicator of psychic well-being
To succeed in dreaming of making love with a person, it is necessary to be well, to feel free at that moment in your life and in your head. “Dreaming, during a dream or immersed in a deep sleep, is a psychic act that reveals a certain level of well-being, details Véronica Olivieri-Daniel. In other words, people who say they do not remember their dreams do not invest their psychic life enough”.
Journalist specializing in health and well-being (health, nutrition, pregnancy/baby, psycho and sex themes), Julie Giorgetta is a graduate of La Sorbonne and the Ecole Supérieure de Journalisme de Paris. In …
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Dreaming of making love: what does it mean?
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